The Hardest Battle: Changing Yourself
Small Challenges, Big Impact
What does it take to create real change in oneself? We often believe influencing others is the ultimate challenge, but the truth is that the hardest work starts within. Shedding those extra pounds, waking up earlier to read or write, hitting the gym, or cutting back on the booze—these are the daily battles. And here’s the kicker: it’s not like we don’t know our actions compromise our goals, but we do them anyway. Why? Because we’re human, and being human means being flawed.
Life seems to get in the way of what we think we want. That’s why we hold onto clothes that don’t fit, or the Peloton we used to ride daily collects dust in the corner. We convince ourselves we’re still the same person who makes good choices. And for those of us with kids, it feels impossible to start again. Taking time for yourself? That’s selfish, right? But is it? Don’t our kids deserve a more patient, fitter, and knowledgeable parent? It’s the old airplane adage: put on your oxygen mask first before helping others.
I’ve been there. When I left the Army, I swore I wouldn’t become the cliché vet who gains weight post-service. But I did. Slowly. So slowly, I didn’t even notice. I was at happy hour every day after work, slowly packing on the pounds without even realizing it. Here’s a picture of me a couple of years after getting out—my wife didn’t even remember me looking like that (thanks Facebook memories).
Ten years later, I’m staring down 40 and in the best shape of my life—better shape than when I was at West Point and the Army.
So, what happened? How did I get here? Simple: I started training Jiu-Jitsu and have been doing it consistently for over eight years. But my fitness has had its ups and downs even with that routine. Whenever I feel myself slipping, I lean into a challenge to kickstart my motivation again.
“Everything you want is on the opposite side of a sacrifice.”
Want to make a change? Start small. I’ve found that creating small challenges is the most effective way to kickstart a shift in habits and behaviors.
Humans thrive on challenge—it’s in our DNA. And we’re not alone. Take dogs, for example. They’re built to walk long distances, to herd, to work. Don’t give a dog enough exercise, and they become anxious or depressed and start acting like a teenager in full-on rebellion. The cure? A simple walk, or in other words, putting them to work. We’re no different. We must be challenged, pushed, and put to work to reach our potential. Sometimes, that challenge is as also as simple as a daily walk.
Small challenges can be the catalyst for impactful change. Whether it’s a sober month, a daily commitment to exercise, a special diet, or an extended fast (I’ve done several 72-hour fasts, and while miserable, research suggests they can help prevent cancer), these challenges can ignite a transformation that snowballs into even more positive habits. Discipline is about saying “go” when you want to say “no”—like getting up early or hitting the gym after a long day of traveling. On the other hand, self-control is saying “no” when you want to say “yes”—like resisting that morning donut or skipping the extra serving of mac and cheese.
And here’s the thing about motivation: it doesn’t just appear. It’s a function of three forces—direction, persistence, and intensity. Imagine pushing a car in neutral. At first, it’s all effort. You use every bit of strength to get the thing moving. But once it’s rolling, the push gets easier, and momentum takes over. That’s what a challenge is—your initial push. Once you’ve started, motivation is easier to maintain.
The key is to start small (it’s easier and less likely you will get hurt, which will kill your progress). Challenges are the spark that lights the fire. Once that fire is going, it’s much easier to keep it burning. If you can consistently create challenges for yourself, you’ll build discipline, gain self-control, and reach new heights. But like anything else worth having, these skills require practice. So, what’s stopping you from setting your next challenge?
Here are several tried-and-true challenging options to help you get started (hardest to easiest, in my opinion):
1. 75 Hard
A mental toughness challenge by Andy Frisella that includes:
Two 45-minute workouts (one outside)
Drinking a gallon of water
Reading ten pages of a non-fiction book
Following a strict diet (no cheat meals)
No Drinking Alcohol
Taking a progress picture every day—for 75 days straight.
2. 30 Soft
The softer (read: more manageable) version of 75 Hard. It includes:
A daily 45 min workout
Clean eating (with one cheat meal a week)
Staying hydrated (100 oz daily)
Read ten pages of any book
Reduce screen time to an hour a day—for 30 days straight.
3. 72-Hour Fast
A three-day fast in which you consume only water, tea, or black coffee is strict, but studies suggest potential health benefits, such as reducing inflammation and improving cellular repair.
It's pretty self-explanatory: commit to running every single day for a set period of time (30, 60, or 90 days). Whether you run a mile or a marathon, it’s all about consistency. Make sure to mix your pace and distance—a few days of training in Zone 2 and some days doing sprints to improve your VO2 Max.
Commit to meditating for at least 13 minutes a day. Use apps like 10% Happier, Waking Up (my favorite), or Headspace to guide your practice and add more mindfulness to your routine.
6. Sober October/Dry January/Alcohol Absence April/Dry July
Commit to a month without alcohol to reset, refresh, and improve your health. Popular months like Dry January or Sober October make it easy to join the movement.
7. Squatober
A month-long challenge where you do squats every single day in October. It’s not just about getting more muscular legs—it’s about discipline and consistency.
8. 20-Day Cold Shower Challenge
Commit to a cold shower every day for 20 days. Benefits include improved circulation, boosted metabolism, and increased mental toughness. It’s as brutal as it sounds—but that’s the point.
For 21 days, commit not to complain—about anything. It’s harder than it sounds, but it’s a great way to develop a more positive mindset and focus on solutions instead of problems. Add a daily gratitude journal entry for good measure to help you stay on track.
Set your alarm for 5:00 AM (or earlier) and get up every morning for 30 days. This challenge helps you build a morning routine and reclaim time for yourself. It only takes three days of consistency to help you make this a habit. Try to go to bed and wake up at the same time every day to help set your circadian rhythm to this new routine.
Doing these challenges with friends or family makes it even more fun, and you have more people to hold yourself accountable.
Share this post with a friend you want to get started with.
Don’t get captured,
Zach
Great article Zach. Love the list of challenges.